How to start believing you deserve money 💸
Updated: 6 days ago
To write this, I started by asking myself two questions.
1. Who 'deserves' money, and who doesn't?
2. Where does the idea of 'deserving' come from?
I had answers pop up pretty readily for the first one. It's obvious, right? In the 'deserving' camp are people who use their time and energy to do good in the world - those people deserve a reward. Whereas wealthy people who don't pay taxes and actively damage the world don't 'deserve'.
It seemed pretty cut and dried until I reached the second question: where does the idea of 'deserving' as we each understand it come from? The concept that some people 'deserve' and other people don't? Media - most definitely - everywhere you look is the idea that some people are more deserving than others. Our parents - yup - usually rewards came from at least one parent when we did something good. School – Same story if we're lucky. Government – Umm...probably best not to go there. Work? In general, but it depends on your manager.
The messages are everywhere, so it's no surprise that we develop an idea, adopted as fact, that we either 'deserve' big money or we don't. But is it true? And if not can we completely reject that idea, now that we're grown-ass women, working for ourselves and can make our own minds up about all kinds of big concepts?
You know what? I think we can!
This mental merry-go-round led me to this idea: To feel we 'deserve' good money we have to believe that 'deserving' is real in an important way. And if we choose not to believe that anymore?
I found when I questioned whether the entire concept of deserving is necessary, it was an amazing way of removing that contender from the repertoire of negative money beliefs we carry around each day. To deserve or not deserve money becomes just another story we tell ourselves.
Let's look at that idea a bit more.
So if we assume there's no such thing as 'deserving' money the concept of deserving wealth is an odd construct that we internalised from every message that surrounds us about money, from birth to you reading this blog right now.
Here are some messages you might have absorbed over the years that relate to that construct:
> Wealth is only possible if you work really hard.
> Only some people can be rich (not people like you).
> Money doesn’t grow on trees (money is scarce).
Have you ever had a little voice that tells you that although you want to make money doing what you love, you don’t deserve to be wealthy. As in properly rolling in it? Maybe the voice says something like: “Look, money is just not you. You don’t deserve to have more money than you need to get by, and what would you do with it anyway?”
Even when you start making great money and the numbers in the bank grow to more than you could ever imagine, often people retain this voice. It might show up as guilt then – I have more than I need.
Your ‘chimp brain’, as Prof Stephen Peters calls it in The Chimp Paradox, is reacting to your story with money, and it’s feeding you all kinds of negativity around what you deserve.
But money is abundant. No, it really is! Regardless of whether you think you 'deserve it' or not!
"Money is abundant" might be a throwaway affirmation that you hear as a sound bite all over social but think for a moment about what it actually means.
Whether or not you have a ton of it, money exists. Money doesn’t care whether you have it or someone else has it, it just is. Like air. Or flowers. Or Marmite.
You don’t deserve it and neither does anyone else. But you also don’t not deserve it (yes, I hear the grammar police sirens too). That’s because 'deserving' is a false emotion to attach to money. And it makes earning money way more difficult and complex than it needs to be.
Don’t put that on money. It doesn’t mind if you have £1 million or £5 in the bank.
And here’s the thing: Whether you believe you deserve millions, or you think you don't, you’ll be right on both counts!
Belief is everything, and you deserve to be happy.
That is all there is. Comment below if you agree!
PS - Have you ever wanted to raise your prices but had serious doubts about how to go about it, or whether your customers will pay? Download my free guide to get in the right mindset so you can happily raise your worth - 3 Steps to Confidently Raising your Prices
PPS - And, if you think your money beliefs are holding you back and you're ready to uncover and release them for yourself, book a free 30 Minute Breakthrough Chat with me!